The Tournament of Madness
by Denizen Of Madness
Summary: In the strange and cracktastic Oc town known as Duran City, sixteen insane and socially defective trainers will duke it out in a tournament of idiotic proportions! But, is it just me, or is there something going on in the background? And why is a Mary-Sue sponsoring the whole thing? Oh, and N has been kidnapped.
1. Intro

Duh duh da DUH!

Welcome one and all to the Madness tournament of trainers. We are looking for the zaniest, craziest, most utterly insane trainers from all over the Pokémon world. Young or old. Sane or completely insane, we will battle you until you go home crying for your mommy.

What you need to do is give a name of the character, the Pokémon you will be using. You will use six Pokémon and have two substitutes. We need age, a physical description, and a history of the person. We also need their personality. What do they like? What do they hate? And other info that might be helpful.

The winner of our lovely little scuffle will be able to receive one of two prizes. One: A cash prize of 500,000,000 Poké dollars! The other prize is a fabulous mystery prize!

NO SUES! If a Sue is spotted we will alter the character within boundaries and create a non-Sue character.

If they cannot be saved, they will not be used. They will be terminated and/or hunted down for our amusement.

We are looking for fourteen OC's.

Here's my OC:

**Name- Ember Kingsley**

**Age- 17**

**Appearance- Black hair, Green eyes, Slim. Red T-shirt with a Black diamond shape on the front. Plain blue jeans. Black jacket.**

**Height- 5'9 ft.**

**Hair (style, color, other features) Black Pulled into a ponytail, bangs framing her face.**

**Personality- Easy going, slightly arrogant. Loves playing on a guitar. Has an OCD level of focus. A compulsive liar. Likes to show off her guitar skills, wants to make it into the big leagues.**

**History- A young woman from Sinnoh, she makes a living by traveling around and playing on her guitar. Nothing else known, as she lies about her past compulsively, not that she was abused or anything, she just does that.**

**Pokémon (X6, X2 Substitutes) MAIN TEAM: An Exploud named Mike, a Staravia, a Pachirisu, a Scizor, a Gothorita, and a Machoke. SUBS: Charizard, and a Sneazle (I think that's how it's spelled.)**

**Extra info- Carries a Guitar everywhere, even to a battle. During interviews with other people she will try to show off. And her own interviews.**

**Why they want to win- To win prize money, as she is broke, and to get recognition for her musical talents**.

And here is my insane friend,Anticsaremes' OC. You may or may not know her.

Name-** Angel Juarez (First name pronounced on hell)**

**Age- 16**

**Appearance- A FRICKEN DUDE! He is a Puerto Rican. He has shaggy black hair. Wears a bright and colorful poncho, shorts, and sandals.**

**Height- 5'5 ft.**

**Hair- shaggy black hair. Often gets in his eyes.**

**Personality- ignorant, stubborn, and easily irritated. But loves candy and has a secret My Little Ponyta obsession.**

**History- grew up in a winery so he had a lot of drunken relatives, strange parties and moments where he cannot remember what the hell he was doing. He yells at Ember when he has a "hangover".**

**Pokémon- Rapidash named Twilight, Charmeleon named Spike, a Vileplume named hangover, an Ampharos named Sparky, Vulcorona named Crona, and Ditto named Blobo.**  
><strong>The substitutes are Chandelure named Heartless and Riolu named Black Star.<strong>

**Extra Info: Angel wears a necklace with a broken Mary Sue power ring. A Mary-Sue killed his parents**

**Why he wants to win- to help pay for the Kill Mary-Sue association.**

Don't worry. In the sense of fairness, neither of our characters will win. One may get a little far, but we won't have them win it all.

The tournament will be held at Duran city, in Kanto. See you all there!

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><p>"When are we going to be introduced?" Ember asked Angel as they boarded the plane to Duran city.<p>

"I don't know, Ember. I just don't know."


	2. The Flight

**Author's Note: Wow, I got like ten reviews in the first night! Thanks, but we still need about three more characters. Anyway, I think some people may have misunderstood something. This is a CRACK/ HUMOR Tournament story! We (me and Anticsareme) wanted weird characters. We'll still use everyone that we got. But, you know, we won't take any characters seriously. We still need three more guys/gals to screw around with. Please don't get mad if your character loses. We'll try to use characters after their defeat. Anywayz, please enjoy this cracky filler.**

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><p>"Hey! Hands off, perv!" Ember shouted at the security officer who was giving her a pat down. He struggled to finish his examinationas she smacked him in the head vigorously.<p>

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but it's regulation that every passenger is searched thoroughly in case they have anything potentially dangerous to the flight," the officer said in between the strikes to the head.

"Oh good god, not again. Why does this happen every time she decides to travel? She makes such a big deal about it. She's the biggest pervert the world has ever known anyway," Angel sighed.

"Hey, I resemble that remark! Don't take it back!" She shouted at Angel as the poor security guard finally let her go. She ran ahead as Angel received his pat down, or as Ember likes to call them, "perv downs".

"She's an idiot, crazy, and _a liar._ Whatever she tells you don't believe her. You will lose everything, including your mind. I already have lost mine twice. Still looking for it sadly enough," he said almost crying.

"What's this?" The officer pulled a flask out of Angels' pocket.

"Um… um… um, um um um um… IT'S IMPORTED SODA!" he yelled spastically. He yanked the flask out of the officers' hand and ran for it.

A rather nerdy young man watched the crazy scene unfold. He wore coke bottle glasses, a button up shirt with a bolo tie, and rainbow suspenders. Pushing his huge-ass glasses up, he muttered "I'm glad I'm not on the same flight as those guys."

From behind Angel and Ember was another girl. She glared at the scene in front and said nothing. Headphones blaring music that others could barely hear. She wore camo shorts and had a camo hat. Around her neck were two necklaces. One a coffin the other resembled a skeleton key. An aura that said 'Don't piss me off.' But in her head she was only thinking about how she wished she had her camera on her.

**On the plane…**

"So, how did you manage to escape security?" Ember asked Angel as they got seated.

"You already know," he said rubbing makeup off his face, "This is on the list of things we shall never discuss again. I don't care what you say," he said getting into poncho. He frowned and shivered, he _hated_ cross dressing.

"Okay! Fine. I'll never not ask you again. So, how did you escape?"

"Usted es un culo," he said with a straight face, "I dressed up as you and ran the hell away. They will arrest you in a few minutes. Good luck in prison."

Ember chuckled. "You really know how to sweet talk a man, Ange."

"But you're a woman! And don't call me that!"

"Where the hell is it!" An extremely loud voice ringed throughout the plane. Everyone there turned around. They saw the uber-pissed girl rifling through her bag. "Where the fuck is it!"

A flight attendant who wore a fake tan and too much make up approached her. Grabbing her shoulder lightly, she asked "Is something wrong, miss? If you need assistance, I would be glad to help."

"Where did you put my I-pod, bitch! You stole it! I'll cut your throat and drink you blood for this injustice!" She shouted at her. The pissed teen punched the attendant and picked her up by the collar and threw her out the window.

Ember jolted up quickly, and got her guitar out of the overhead bin. "What are you going to do? Hit her in the head, sooth her rage with a sonnet? What woman, what!" Angel freaked out.

"Screw that! I'm getting out of here!" Ember yelled. But the plane had already taken off into the air, "SHIT!"

The girl gave her a murderous glare.

"Where is it?" She jumped on Ember and tried to strangle her before seeing something under the seat, "Oh. There it is," she said grabbing an I-pod, "Mommy's been looking everywhere for you."

She got off of the half mauled Ember and sat down in an empty seat like nothing happened.

Angel pulled Ember back into her seat. "You okay?" he asked.

"Good lord! What is that woman's problem?" Ember groaned in pain.

"I don't know. But I wish you hadn't broken my camera. I could've won a hundred thousand dollars from that video alone. Then I wouldn't have to do this tournament. Ah the places I could go," he said blissfully.

"Hey, are you going to the Duran City Tournament?" That nerdy guy I mentioned earlier asked.

"Nerd alert!" Ember yelled, and then groaned in pain.

"Yeah. Who wants to know?" Angel asked suspiciously.

Mr. Nerd gave a creepy grin. "The names Fredrick. But you can call me Fred, cutie," "Cutie" being Ember.

"The only thing I'll call you is Creep, now get out of my face, or I'll stab you in the groin." Her voice had a sharp undertone.

"You won't be saying that when I win!" he declared.

Angel cracked his knuckles, and Fred quickly went back to his seat.

And the whole flight was rather pleasant from then on…

Until that crazy chick lost her I-pod again.


	3. A not so sunny day

**Authors note: We now just need two more characters. I forgot to mention that we need you to send the move sets of your Pokémon.**

**Ishi Bana Bana: Yeah, your character is good enough. Thanks!**

**2CrzY4U: I still need your move set, please.**

**Now, time for more crack!**

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><p>Many people called Sunny Allen insane. And they were right. At first glance, Sunny seemed to be a sweet and harmless girl. What with her blond hair pulled into pigtails, innocent blue eyes, pure sunshine yellow shirt and shorts, and purple flip flops, she looked like a typical teenage girl. Of course, those who didn't know Sunny didn't know that she was a master of an ancient martial art that involved flip flops.<p>

Her foot wear was among the most dangerous weaponry humanity ever devised. They could cut like knives, and were stylish to boot. Why someone like her wanted to be a trainer is beyond the comprehension of even an omniscient author such as me.

Sunny first heard of the crackilicious tournament of Duran city one day when she met up with her sister in Viridian city.

"Like Omg, Sunny! Look at this!" her sister held up a flier advertising a tournament that asked for eccentric trainers to battle. "You would fit right in there!" Her sister was a good 5 years older than her, with a tan and straight blond hair.

Sunny grabbed the paper. "How can you read this? It's all gibberish!"

"Um, you're holding it upside down."

Sunny took a second look at it. "Oh, you're right. Silly me!" She flipped it right side up. "It says that there are two grand prizes for the winner. One is 500,000,000 Poké dollars donated by the tournaments sponsor Goff Corp. The other possible prize is a mystery." Sunny stared off into space, imaging the fame that cam that would come from winning the tournament. People everywhere would line up to lick her toes. Oh, how **_glorious _**it would be.

"It says that it's being held in Duran city." Her sister said.

"That's just north west of here, Sari! We should go right now!"

Just as they were about to leave town, a Reshiram crashed twenty yards to their right. Curious as to what the crap just happened, they ran to the injured legendary.

A very pretty young man with long green hair lumbered off of Reshiram and groaned in pain. His outfit was stylish and would probably could be associated with the hipster sub group.

I suppose you could call him… a bishounen hipster.

DUN DUN DUN.

"Oh, I really must learn to drive Reshiram better," he groaned getting off the ground brushing the dirt off his clothes, "I don't think I could've had a crappier landing."

He looked over at the two girls, one with a stick who had started to poke him repeatedly.

"What are you doing?" asked the younger.

"Seeing if it's alive."

"I think that's pretty obvious," said the younger. He grabbed the stick and snapped it in half. Next thing he knew he was being beaten by the girl's flip flop. And oh god/Buddha/or whatever god he believed in it hurt!

"Please! I beg you! Stop hitting me!" He cried between the strikes upon his person.

"NO! Not until you tell me your name!"

"N! N is my name!" Sunny stopped hitting him.

"N?" She asked incredulously. "Just N? Or N as in…?"

"As in Natural Harmonia Gropius."

She looked at him carefully, "I never took hipsters for the 'groping' type. I thought they were more of the 'complaining' type of person."

"Wait, what's a hipster?" N asked.

"A bunch of condescending douchebags," Sunny said. "Hey, Sari. I just had a great idea!"

"What is it?" Sari asked.

"Let's keep him as a pet! He can carry our stuff! Please, I'll feed him and clothe him and brush him and make him look pretty and give him toys!" She got on her knees and begged.

"Okay! Let's take him to the tournament!"

"Do I get a say in this?" N asked.

"No!" Both sisters shouted in unison. Sunny grabbed N by his hair and dragged him into the sunset.


	4. Twaincest

**A/N: So, yeah we still need one more crazy character! Also, the title will make sense by the end of the chapter. That said, please forgive me for what will happen today.**

**S/A/N: I actually get to write? I'm the side author here. Anticsareme. You really don't want to know what will happen if we don't get another character. It will end badly…**

**Especially if there are no reviews!**

A loud whistle penetrated the air as wheels began to turn on the track. A train began moving. Most would say it was routine. The train left like it did everyday taking the conductors and their horrors elsewhere. But for one reason or another that was not the case. On that train were trainers. Again, pretty normal. The trainers were all heading to Duran city. For what reason no one knew.

**{In the conductors' room…}**

"Attention passengers! The train will be leaving in five minutes, so please be seated! This trip will last about four hours! No stops, no chance of getting off!" Ingo announced into the train's intercom system.

"And that's three and a half hours we can spend fooling around," Emmet whispered into Ingo's ear from behind. Ingo felt chills roll down his spine.

"Fine, but lock the door. We don't want to be caught again."

Emmet chuckled as he threw his hat on the floor and lunged at Ingo.

**{With the passengers…}**

Gingersnap knew why she was going. And she was grinning giddy with the thought of the tournament that would take place there. The one she was going to win. She looked around at the fellow people in her car on the train. But no one could really tell from behind her sunglasses. She always had them on. They hid her black eyes. She was also wearing a white hoodie and loose jeans. She sat in the darkest corner observing more than anything. She really didn't talk. Not a lot anyway.

The other people in her car were typical trainers. One was sitting by a window. He had spikey brown hair and blue grey eyes. And for some reason a scar running down the right side. He wore a sleeveless black shirt with white baggy pants tucked into black boots, he also wore black gloves. He was scowling at practically everyone.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ALL STARING AT!" he yelled. Gingersnap and the other passengers jumped back, "Got a problem with me?"

"What the hell is your problem?" yelled another passenger. He had black hair and blue eyes. His hair was spikey but then flat on the right side. He wore black fishnet shirt with a white jacket unzipped on top of it, also red jeans.

"I got you freaks staring at me!"

"You're the one yelling like a moron," he said.

"Don't talk to me like that! I am the scariest person you'll ever meet," he said angrily.

"My mom?" he asked

"NO! I am Cloud Twilight!" he cried.

"Would you stop yelling?"

"If you mother-f***ers will stop staring at me!"

"Oh my god. You are a moron," said the other guy. He sat down back in his seat.

"I am not a moron!"

"Okay, everyone. Please quiet down. My Smoochum needs to take a two hour nap every day, or else she gets cranky," A young man with dark brown hair, brown eyes, pale skin. He wore pink cutoff denim short shorts with a low cut purple long sleesaidve (whatever the hell that is) shirt and various necklaces and bracelets, plus an earring in his left ear. Over all, he looked pretty manly.

"Shove it, Liberace!" Cloud shouted.

"First off, my name is Mikey; second, what's a Liberace? Third, you're being very mean!" Mikey whined.

"I don't know, but stop your whining! It's giving me a headache!" 

"But I thought you wanted whining!"

"When did I ever say that?"

"They fight like a married couple…" Gingersnap muttered.

"I heard that!" Cloud shouted. "Get over here!"

Just as they were about to fight, they heard a loud moan.

"What was that?" Cloud asked.

"It sounded like it came from the conductors' quarters. Let's go check it out!" Mikey said. Everyone went to the door.

"Now, who's going first?" Gingersnap asked. They all looked at each other.

"Fine. I'll do it," said Mikey. His hand shook violently with fear as the moaning seemed to grow louder. His sweaty palms turned the handle, slowly opening the door. He looked inside, "MY EYES!"

He jumped back and ran into a corner.

"I thought you locked the door," said one voice.

"I thought I did too. Guess I was a bit caught up," chuckled another voice.

"Hand me my pants will you?"

Cloud and Gingersnap stepped away. Ginger gingerly wiped blood pouring from her nose. "Oh, snap! I wish I brought my camera!"

"What?" questioned Cloud.

"You realize how much money you can make from sexy twincest?" she asked. Cloud shook his head.

"You're crazy."

"Hey guys," Mikey said excitedly, "Room for one more?"

Cloud, Gingersnap, and the twins looked at Mikey who gave them a playful gaze. The twins looked at each other.

"Want to tap that ass?"

"Will you lock the door this time?"


	5. You've got to be shtting me

**A/N: Like, hey, again! I guess that you like this if you've been reading this far! Anyway, we still need one more character. Also, if you haven't already, please send your Pokémon's move sets!**

DUN Dun Dun DUN!

"Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the third annual tricycle race to Duran city! We are so glad so many of you have decided to participate. Everyone line up!" yelled the announcer enthusiastically. Lacete smiled. Victory would be hers. She could almost taste it. Though she was a bit nervous. It was hard to ride a tricycle in a kimono. She stood ready in a green kimono covered in golden raquazas. She stood proud at age twelve. Her long scarlet hair had black streaks.

"Hey kid," said another girl. She smiled down at Lacete. She had short brown curly hair. She looked like a normal girl. She wore a white shirt with black on the shoulders. She also had jeans and a pair of converse, "Aren't you a bit young to be in this contest?"

"I am twelve," she growled. The older girl blinked.

"Don't you need to be thirteen to enter?" she asked. Lacete paled. Stupid rules and regulations.

"Please don't tell," she pouted. Her eyes went wide with innocence.

"Okay. I'm Trista Hastera. Who are you?" she asked. Lacete smiled deviously. She could feel like she could use this girl to her advantage.

"Lacete. Lacete Derntruff," she said coolly. Trista smiled.

"Okay. See you in Duran," said Trista running off to her tricycle. Lacete scowled. Idiot girl. She sat on her tricycle. She looked at the poor idiot girl who would lose. Because no one would beat her. She was perfection. Her mommy said so.

"On your mark! Get set! Go!"

The people took off. Except for Lacete. She hadn't moved an inch. She never learned how to ride a bike.

"Come on, you stupid thing! Move!" Lacete shouted. She jumped a little bit, trying to kick start movement. "I command you!"

"…Please?"

Trista, who was tied for second place, couldn't help but look back and felt guilty about leaving a twelve year old girl behind. She turned around faster than anyone else could see. She zoomed in front of her and stopped she tied a piece of rope to Lacete's tricycle.

"Hold on for dear life!" Trista said.

"What…? AAAAHHHH!" Lacete screamed. The world around her was blurring around her. They were passing other tricyclists at an alarming speed. She swore to herself she would never do this again. She was thankful for her white fingerless gloves as they kept her from squeezing the handle bars to tight and cutting off her circulation. They went on for an hour without stopping. A few were a couple hundred meters behind them.

"Okay," Lacete began to yell, "Now push me so I will win."

They screeched to a stop. Trista's kind eyes became hard. She untied the rope. Lacete gasped as Trista passed the finish line. She was even more surprised that after she passed the finish line, she walked over to her and pulled her past the finish line.

"…And the first place young lady just pulled another contestant passed the finish line."

"Don't ever… tell me to throw away… my hard work… for you to be… a stupid princess…," she gasped. She then fell over. A group of paramedics came over and poured water on her head.

"Huh? How the…? Who the…? Why the…? Where am I?" she asked. Lacete looked at her carefully.

"Duran City," Lacete said cautiously.

"Oh. Really? Sweet. There is a contest there... here I want to enter!" she said softly yet in an excited tone. Lacete perked up.

"Contest you say. Then I shall win. I shall win it!"

"Well good luck to you," smiled Trista. Lacete scowled. A worthy opponent had revealed themselves. And she was almost frightening.

**S/A/N:'Allo. Sorry. Denizen is sick today. That's why it is short.**


	6. Dance your feet off

**A/N: Okay, now we have all the characters we need! Now, let's go on with the show!**

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><p>Bum Bum Bum, a techno beat sounded throughout Pewter city's streets. A lone fourteen year old boy was dancing down one of the streets with a simple head bob and shuffle of his feet. His hair was black with a purple streak going through it. He had a demonic smirk that seemed permanently etched onto his face. His pale skin stood out against his dark clothes and green eyes darted around town. He wore a tee shirt with a Ghastly on the front sticking its tongue out in a mocking manner. Black skinny jeans were being held up by a Duskull belt. He had his black hoodie in hand that he normally wore. He was also wearing a pair of Doc Martins. He danced down the street unaware of the people around him or what they were saying, too deeply engrossed in the music.<p>

The people walking down the sidewalk ignored the boy, instead looking around to find the source of the blasted music. There were two exceptions to the general confused populace, and they were obviously important to the loose plot.

One guy, named Dakota, and another named Canus. Dakota had messy and unkempt brown hair. His left eye was hazel and his right eye was green. This was due to an accident he had when he was attacked by a crazy Hypno. He still hadn't gotten over that. He had torn jeans and a messy white tank top. He had a grey hoodie that he had on over that. He wore skull crusher headphones. He didn't hear the music in the city over the music he was listening to his own.

Canus had auburn hair that was gelled and combed. Of course, none of that mattered since it was covered by a train cap. Why he even bothered doing that to his hair when he would put a hat on is beyond me. He had dark blue eyes. He was skinny by guy standards. Canus wore a suit with golden buttons. The buttons were _very_ shiny. Seriously, they were so shiny that they attracted Murkrow's constantly. It was seriously a severe hindrance.

"Dude, I think that kid is challenging us to a dance off!" Dakota nudged Canus to notice the kid. "We can't just let him just… _best_ us."

"Really? How much coffee have you had?" asked Canus.

"Shut up! My coffee issue isn't as bad as your daddy problems!"

Tears welled up in Canus's eyes.

"Sh-shut up," he cried.

"Get over your daddy problems. He left you," Dakota said shaking him violently back and forth, "We have to out dance him."

"Do you think my dad will accept me if I do?" he asked. Dakota rolled his eyes.

"Sure. Why not?" said Dakota as he began to dance after the dancing boy. He sped up and nearly caught up to him when he dropped his wallet.

Dakota picked up the other guy's walled and opened it up. There was 3,000 Poke dollars. He slipped 500 out and pocketed it himself. The I.D inside the wallet made him snicker. The owner, the dancer in front of him who was dancing off was Nathan Periwinkle. He doubled over laughing as Canus caught up to him.

"What are you laughing at?" asked Canus. Dakota showed him the wallet and Canus snorted as he tried to stifle his laughter.

"We'll have to return this you know," he said taking the wallet from Dakota swiping 1,000 Poke.

"Fine! OR… OR…" Dakota began dancing furiously after Nathan. Canus stared for a few seconds, shrugged, and began dancing too. Soon, the three boys danced themselves out of Pewter city and through the woods. None of them noticed the change of scenery.

They eventually made it to another town, one with a large golden arch and a myriad of strange and plot related buildings. The most prominent of which was a large stadium shaped like a cheese burger in the center.

"Is that a giant cheeseburger?" asked Dakota.

"Oh good, so I'm not crazy," said Nathan. He ran over and tried to take a bite. He gnawed on it for a bit, "That's not a cheeseburger," he whined with Canus and Dakota running over, "It's made of cement and… ketchup?"

He poked the walls where something red and definitely a liquid came off on his finger. He stuck it in his mouth for a taste.

"In local news, a girl by the name of Mary Sue was murdered here. As you can see, her blood coats the walls of 'I has Cheezburger' stadium," a reporter said airing news to all of Duran City. Behind her was Nathan, Dakota and Canus.

Nathan's eyes widened in horror as he began to gag.

"NOT THE KETCHUP!" he cried. Canus looked over at the reporter who came running over for an interview with the people on the scene.

"RUN!" he yelled. Dakota and him ran realizing they had left Nathan behind rocking back and forth. Realizing they couldn't leave him (they still had his wallet they had to return) Dakota ran back and dragged him across the ground.

"Worst day ever!" Dakota yelled. They turned a corner avoiding the reporter (thank god for her being slower in heels) and saw a giant poster. The Tournament of Madness. Sponsored by Goff Corp. The president was in the corner. She looked creepy. It said her name was Ebony Dark'ness Raven Way.

"That has got to be… the most retarded name I have ever seen. Well no. Hilberta Nina Narcosis Hooker was worse," Canus said.

"Well, we might as well sign up," Dakota said, studying the poster.

"We should probably return his wallet now," Canus whispered to Dakota.

"FINE! Or… Or…" They all began to dance again.

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><p><strong>AN: Sorry, guys, but there will no chapter next week, since it's spring break for me. Anyway, I think we introduced all sixteen guys and gals for the story, so the next chapter will actually start the tourney. Until then, see ya!**


	7. Mall Ratatas

**A/N: And we're back! But it looks like I forgot to introduce two**  
><strong>characters somehow… Sorry!<strong>

**Without further ado, let's start this freak fest**!

**Chapter 7: And the other guys!**

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><p>In all his years, Ken Hayashi had never before seen a sight like this. Two teenage girls were dragging a bishounen hipster around in a tutu.<p>

It was in the fair (yeah, right) city of Duran. The sun looked like it did on the Raisin Bran cereal box, complete with the scoops of raisin, which it was dumping all over the place. Naturally, people stayed inside, not wanting to touch the yucky nastiness that was raisin.

Ken was a 19 year old guy with normal length black hair, brown eyes, and light skin. He wore dark blue hakama and brown sandals. Despite the strangeness of seeing a guy in a tutu being dragged around the shopping mall by a couple of teenage girls, Ken didn't seem to care. He knew what he wanted. To win the Tournament of Madness, get the cash, and find out what the hell that mystery prize is.

Despite the fact he didn't care, he still tried to figure out what those girl were thinking, putting a guy in a tutu. Not that he cared. Nope. Not at all. Ah, what the heck? He's gonna stalk them to find out what's going on!

Disguising himself as a fire hydrant, Ken began to follow the trio at a distance. Sunny Allen, the girl introduced in chapter 3 was one of the two girls, along with her older sister Sari. The guy was N. You know the pretty boy who that women want, and men also want. The guy I keep messing with for some reason?

N obviously wasn't happy. This was the third time in his life that he had ever worn a tutu. And yes, he looked damn good in it. He stopped trying to struggle against Sunny, for he had realized he was powerless against her flip-flop technique. He now just let her drag him by his ponytail whenever she wanted.

Speaking of which, she was now dragging N by his hair into a Baby Gap.

"OMGZ!" Sunny literally pronounced every letter. She held up a small Disney Princess dress. "Sari, don't you think that this would look sooooooooooooooo pretty on our new baby hipster?"

"Like, It totally does!" Sari grabbed the little girls clothes from her sisters hands. "What do you think, puppy?"

"I think that it won't fit!" N said through his clenched teeth.

"Nonsense! You'll be so pretty! You'll be the talk of the town! Now, into the dressing room you go!" Sunny said, pushing N behind the curtains of a dressing room with the tiny dress. Sunny sat down beside her beloved sister on a leather couch.

"_What the daiquiri?_" Ken thought as he peaked from behind a store mannequin.

N walked out from the dressing room, clad in the tight fitting clothing that was made for a three year old girl. His stomach and arms were exposed, free for all of the fangirls to see. The skirt was so short, it barely covered his legs. Dear god, what have I wrote?

N had a frustrated look on his face. "See! I told you! It doesn't fit!" Despite the fact that N stopped fighting against her wishes, he had to wonder if she really thought he was some sort of sick fusion between a puppy and a baby.

Sunny, on the other hand smiled at him. Little did N know, Sunny truly DID think that he was a baby and a puppy rolled into one package, and thus treated him as such. "Nonsense!" She said. "You look sooooo pretty, baby-puppy!" Sunny cooed. "Now, let's go pay for this, okay? You should wear it out of the store!"

And so, Sunny dragged N by the ponytail again. Ken watched in awe as they paid for the baby clothes and left.

**{Later, at the food court...}**

Ken eventually followed them to the food court, where they ordered generic fast food and sat down at a table, Sunny sitting next to N, and Sari sitting across from Sunny.**  
><strong>

"Hey, Sunny?" Sari began to ask her sister.

"Mmph, yeah?" Sunny asked as she stuff a bite of burger in her mouth.

"Why's there a guy dressed as a fire hydrant following us?" Sari pointed to Ken, who was sitting two tables behind her.

Kens' eyes widened at the realization of his discovery. He tried to get up from the chair and run away, which was difficult to do, since the costume covered his legs; this rendered it difficult to maneuver around. Ken tripped and fell flat on his face.

He soon got up and ran as fast as he could, pulling the costume above hi legs. Sunny finish her burger and fries in one bite, then chased after Ken. She cornered him against a soda machine, and removed her flip-flops. Using them, she made precise cuts along Kens' costume, removing it completely. Thankfully, he was wearing his clothes under it.

Sunny growled, "I don't care why you were following us, just don't do it again!" And with that, she crouched and started to do the crab walk, making pinching motions with her fingers and saying "Paras" in a high pitched voice. Ken had no idea as to where the crap that came from. He knew not to fuck around with that girl, cause she was completely INSANE! Now,he just needs to go to that tourney...

* * *

><p><strong>Later, in a random area of the mall...<strong>

* * *

><p>All things considered, Mathias Beye was having an awesome day. He was just looking around the mall, looking to find something to do, messing around with with his buckyballs (whatever those are) and found something awesome: a cat fight!<p>

Specifically, between Ember and Lacete.

Crap, almost forgot! I gotta describe Mathias! So he has Brown eyes, short, strong and athletic but you can't see any showy muscles or anything. Half Filipino and half white, but you really  
>can't tell he's got any white in him at all. Black t-shirt with the word<br>"TUBA", which has wings on the sides, across the front in gray, with Dark jeans,  
>silver and black sneakers, and a black watch. Bluish braces. He wore gray baseball hat. His hair was black and kinda longish.<p>

Anyway, Ember and Lacete were surrounded by people, who formed a circle around them. Also in the crowd were some of the contestants Ember was holding her acoustic guitar.

Ember laughed haughtily. "So you think you can take me on, little girl? I'm a freakin' rock star!"

Lacete chuckled dryly. "Oh, really, name your latest album!"

"I-it's gonna drop next month! It's called 'Burn the bitch'!"

Lacete scoffed and turned to the crowd behind her. "See? This chick's just a liar who's not good at anything!"

Ember growled and raised her guitar above her head and yelled, "How dare You? I'll kill you, you ginger bitch!"  
>But before she could strike Lacete on her arrogant head, Angel grabbed her and pinned her arms to the side, preventing an even better fight to start.<p>

Dakota, the guy with all of the tattoos, watched on in amusement, at least until he realized that he was being checked out be Mikey, who was standing right next to him . "Dude, what are you doing?" He asked, mildly disturbed.

Mikey quickly looked away, his eyes then began to dart. "Nothing..." He whistled suspiciously.

"..." Dakota said nothing.

Suzana, the I-pod chick, once again wished that she had brought her camera. The whole scene was comedy gold!

Mathias walked away, already bored. He smiled, though. He had guessed that a lot of these people would be in this Tournament Of Madness. And if that was the case, he was going to have a lot of fun!

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Whew, it's been a few months since I last worked on this! So, yeah Anticsareme has been very busy this summer, so this whole chapter was written by me. And she'll be busy all summer, too. So, again, I'll be doing most of the writing.**

**Anyway, I have finally introduced all of the contestants! And next chapter will be the opening ceremonies, and let me say, it'll start with a shebang! Also next chapter, I'll be releasing all of the profiles for the characters, so read those, please!  
><strong>

**So, now that you're finished reading this, please review! I command you!  
><strong>


	8. Cerimonial Stupidity

**A/N: Howdy, folks! Just as I promised, profiles! Have fun! Also, I have mapped out the Tournament! Huzzah! Anyway, I just noticed that there were a lot of repeated Pokemon, so I changed a few. Please don't be offended. So... many... Eeveelutions... So many Raltslutions... I only did so because it's boring to read the same Pokemon fighting over and over again. I needed to shake it up a bit.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Name- Ember Kingsley<strong>

**Age- 17**

**Appearance- Black hair, Green eyes, Slim. Red T-shirt with a Black diamond shape on the front. Plain blue jeans. Black jacket.**

**Height- 5'9 ft.**

**Hair (style, color, other features) Black Pulled into a ponytail, bangs framing her face.**

**Personality- Easy going, slightly arrogant. Loves playing on a guitar. Has an OCD level of focus. A compulsive liar. Likes to show off her guitar skills, wants to make it into the big leagues.**

**History- A young woman from Sinnoh, she makes a living by traveling around and playing on her guitar. Nothing else known, as she lies compulsively, not that she was abused or anything, she just does that.**

**Extra info- Carries a Guitar everywhere, even to a battle. During interviews with other people she will try to show off. And her own interviews.**

**Why they want to win- To win prize money, as she is broke, and to get recognition for her musical talents**.

**Pokémon (X6, X2 Substitutes) MAIN TEAM: An Exploud named Mike, a Staravia named Starfy, a Pachirisu named Nuts, a Scizor named Español, a Gothorita named Tara, and a Machoke named Roid. SUBS: Charizard named Charmy, and a Sneasle named Snitch.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Name- Angel Juarez (First name pronounced on hell)<strong>

**Age- 16**

**Appearance- A FRICKEN DUDE! He is a Puerto Rican. He has shaggy black hair. Wears a bright and colorful poncho, shorts, and sandals.**

**Height- 5'5 ft.**

**Hair- shaggy black hair. Often gets in his eyes.**

**Personality- ignorant, stubborn, and easily irritated. But loves candy and has a secret My Little Ponyta obsession.**

**History- grew up in a winery so he had a lot of drunken relatives, strange parties and moments where he cannot remember what the hell he was doing. He yells at Ember when he has a "hangover".**

**Pokémon- Rapidash named Twilight, Charmeleon named Spike, a Vileplume named hangover, an Ampharos named Sparky, Volcorona named Crona, and Ditto named Blobo.**  
><strong>The substitutes are Mismagius named Heartless and Riolu named Black Star.<strong>

**Extra Info: Angel wears a necklace with a broken Mary Sue power ring. A Mary-Sue killed his parents.**

* * *

><p><strong>Name - Lacete Derntruff<strong>

**Age - 12**

**Appearance - She wears a forest green kimono that is embroidered in gold **  
><strong>with rayquazas. For shoes she has silver flats. She also has white <strong>  
><strong>fingerless gloves.<strong>

**Height - She is fairly tall, even with her flats on.**

**Hair - Lacete has longish, scarlet colored hair with black streaks in it.**

**History - Despite her appearance, Lacete is a fighter (as in boxing). She **  
><strong>dresses the way she does so people think she is weak. She has been fighting <strong>  
><strong>in tournaments for most of her tiny life.<strong>

**Personality - Lacete is full of energy. She loves to fool people **  
><strong>(explanation to her fooling her opponents), and she is actually a bit of a <strong>  
><strong>loner. She is completely silent during battle, ignoring any rude things <strong>  
><strong>coming from her opponent. She only speaks at the end of the fight, walking <strong>  
><strong>off with a haughty remark if she won.<strong>

**Pokemon: a Zebstrika nicknamed Orielle; Gardevoir nicknamed Platinum; **  
><strong>Tyranitar nicknamed Green; Wigglytuff nicknamed Aria; Umbreon nicknamed <strong>  
><strong>Silver; Bellossom nicknamed Pheobe.<strong>

**Substitute Pokemon - Politoad nicknamed Polibo; Miltank nicknamed Juniper**

**Why she wants to win - She wants to prove to everyone that she isn't just **  
><strong>your typical sweet, little Mary-Sue.<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Name- Trista Hastera<strong>

**Age- 15**

**Height- 5'5**

**Hair-Light brown that falls halfway down her back in a mess of curls**

**Appearance-Brown hair, Hazel eyes, short sleeve white shirt with black on**  
><strong>the shoulders, Blue skinny jeans and converse, Skinny<strong>

**Personality- generally quiet and shy but can get really annoyed easily if someone ticks**  
><strong>her off she is also nice to most people and is easy to please<strong>

**History- She grew up working in her family's general,mart her life was**  
><strong>pretty good but nothing really exciting is known to have happened to her since she talk about her past much.<strong>

**Extra info-Keeps old chain around her wrist, good at persuading people**

**Why they want to win- the money would help keep her parents store above**  
><strong>water.<strong>

**Pokémon- (main) Ninetales, Gallade, Espeon, Mightyena, Dragonite, Ampharos.**

******(subs) Lilligant, Gastrodon******

* * *

><p><strong>Name: Ken Hayashi<strong>

**Age- 19**

**appearance- black hair, brown eyes, light skin, he dark blue hakama and**  
><strong>brown sandals<strong>

**height- 6'2 ft**

**hair- normal length black hair**

**personality- a laidback guy who is lazy. hate to do work most of the time**  
><strong>and extremly love pokemon battles. love to drink sake and has the habit to<strong>  
><strong>call people younger then him kid. he tend to forget people names most of<strong>  
><strong>the time. has a secret urge to steal people stuff and will try to hold it<strong>  
><strong>in but fail most of the time. love to eat and cook spicy food, when the<strong>  
><strong>topic change to spicy food, he become excited and energetic who love to<strong>  
><strong>cook spicy food. he will try to force people to eat his spicy cooking and<strong>  
><strong>get anger when someone waste it. love to do fun and interesting things. has<strong>  
><strong>the lack of understanding of a girl emotions.<strong>

**history- as a child he grew up in the hoen region and his family was cooks**  
><strong>in Lilycove city. everyday he cook and felt it was boring. he began to<strong>  
><strong>steal for his amuesment but got caught once but he was let off becasue he<strong>  
><strong>was a child. he realize his sin and try to hold it in. when he couldn't, he<strong>  
><strong>decided to use it as a excuse and ran away from home to strat his adventure<strong>  
><strong>of freedom. he manage to tame a torchic and have him as a companie.<strong>  
><strong>together they caught their pokemon and won a few battle and lost a few. he<strong>  
><strong>began to travel with a girl who wanted to research pokemon enviroment, he<strong>  
><strong>travel with her for two reasons, one to get money and for fun. after a<strong>  
><strong>while he start to live with her in a lab in the unova region. when he heard<strong>  
><strong>about tournement, he left the lab to join the tournement for fun and<strong>  
><strong>because the girl ask him to investigate the mystery prize.<strong>

**extra info- once awhile he goes to his parents home and his mom and dad**  
><strong>think the girl his girlfriend. the girl have a crush on him but do to his<strong>  
><strong>lack of understanding of a girl emotions they usually get into arguements.<strong>  
><strong>he carry a photo of his family<strong>

**Also reason to want to win is for fun and complete his orders**

**Pokemon- main: Blaziken, Aggron, Golurk, Flygon, Galvantula, Dusclops**

**sub-  
>Gigalith, Metagross<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Name - Mikey Violet<strong>

**Age - 16**

**Appearance - Black/Dark brown hair, Brown eyes, Pale skin. Wears pink cutoff denim short shorts with a low cut purple long sleeve shirt and various necklaces and bracelets. He has an earring in one ear.**

**Height - 6 ft.**

**Hair - dark hair with blue streaks and dip dyed fringe, very stylised and scene looking.**

**Personality - Girly. Very girly (eg, thinks bug Pokemon are gross, ADORES cute Pokemon, etc). A funny type of guy (but laugh AT him funny, not laugh with him funny), however he becomes deadly serious when battling, almost to the degree of being another person.**

**History - The youngest child from a family of five boys, he was always the odd one out. When his brothers were watching Pokemon battles, he was watching Pokemon contests. He traveled around a lot for Pokemon contests, and so has a lot of Pokemon from different regions, but now he has decided to try his hand at pokemon battling for a change of pace.**

**Why he wants to win - He isn't really in it to win the prize, he is just in for the fun of it and to experience it, so if he wins he will choose the mystery prize.**

**Pokemon - MAIN TEAM: Smoochum (who he carries around with him), Delcatty, Lilligant, Starmie, Clefable, Chatot SUBSTITUTES: Rapidash and Beautifly.**

* * *

><p><strong>Name: Gingersnap Appleby <strong>

** Age: 15**

** Appearance: She is pale, with black eyes, hidden beneath sun-glasses. She only takes the sun-glasses off when she's battling. She wears a white hoodie with the hood up, the zipper done up and the sweater comes off when she's battling. Beneath her hoodie she wears a camo tank top with a brown stripe under the bust. for pants she wears slightly loose jeans with black DCs and no socks. **

** Height: 5'5 ft. **

** Hair: Dirty blonde coming to her hips with caramel streaks. She has bangs that hang just infront of her eyes, and It's often up in a messy bun under her hood unless she's battling. Then it's out and loosey goosey. **

** Personality: Guyish, doesn't really talk, very competetive, Has a secret obsession with going into small, dark places, Is easily distracted, Not easily irritated. **

** History: Since she was young she was mistaken for a guy so, she just went for it. But, she battled horribly with her boyish style so she took the boyish stuff off, causing her opponents to go into slight shock in revealation of her being a girl. She ran away from home when she was 10 because her parents wouldn't let her go on a journey. **

**** Extra Info: She and her Gothitelle have this ability so they are psychically connected and can read each others minds and she is deathly afraid of Hoot-Hots and Noctowls. ****

** Why she wants to win: To prove to her parental units she can make it!**

** Pokémon: Main - Frosslass named Magica, a Reuniclus named Musica, Gothitelle named Darka, An Xatu named Psyca, A Murkrow named Hyca and an Emolga named Eleca. **

** Sub - A Vanillite named Icica and a Snorlax named Nika.**

* * *

><p><strong>Name- Mathias Beye<strong>

**Age- 16**

**Appearance- Brown eyes, short, strong and athletic but you can't see it in showy muscles or anything. Half Filipino and half white, but you really can't tell he's got any white in him at all. Black t-shirt with the word TUBA, which has wings on the sides, across the front in gray. Dark jeans, silver and black sneakers, black watch. Bluish braces. Gray baseball hat.**

**Height- 5'3**

**Hair- not long, but not exactly buzz-cut short. Black hair that's kind of fuzzy/soft looking. Goes a third of the way down his forehead.**

**Personality- quiet around most people, but gets playful once you get to know him. Can easily find ways to take away his boredom by playing around with little things. Often plays with those tiny ball shaped magnets (I think they're called buckyballs or something) Talented in music: plays the piano, tuba, trumpet, and any percussion instrument. Turns hyperactive whenever he finds something funny.**

**History- He grew up in Sunyshore City in Sinnoh. He comes from a family of seven kids, him being the middle one. One of his older brothers likes to hit him, so he's unfazed by getting picked on physically.**

****Extra info- makes strong opinions of other people/pokemon/things, but is quiet about them. Sucks at history.****

**Why they want to win- He has three older siblings and their reputations to live up to. He feels he can do it through winning a pokemon competition.**

**Pokemon- Gallade named Ever, Salamence named Never, Gyarados named Spite, Houndoom named Night, Ninetales named Virtue, Lucario named Trust. SUBS: Axew named Answer, and Glalie named Again**

* * *

><p><strong>Name-Marcus Steel<strong>

** Age-19**

** Appearance-Black hair, Blue Eyes, Muscular. Black fishnet shirt with a white jacket unzipped on top of it, also red jeans.**

** Height-6'4**

** Hair-Black spiky at the top and pushed down his right side.**

** Personality-Goofy, but knows when to be serious. A great screamo singer. A good guy overall, but his look makes people scared of him.**

** History-A child whose mother died at birth and his father is unknown. **

****More Info-Despite his past Marcus always looks at his brightside and deeply cares for all pokemon. He also wants to make a name for himself and his pokemon.****

** Why they want to win-So people don't look down on him anymore, he wants people to acknowledge and like him.**

** Pokemon-Electabuzz(Darius), Gengar(Nolan),Bronzong (Ken), Sceptile(Jace), Houndoom(Max), Munchlax(Geoff) Subs: **

** Marowak(Mason), Absol(Ace)**

* * *

><p><strong>Name-Dakota Raines<strong>

**Age-15**

**Appearance-Brown hair, Left eye hazel, Right eye green, Wears Torn jeans, A dirty, white tank top, Occasionally skullcrusher headphones, And the same grey hoodie every day. Younger than he looks, has a couple of tattoos. Oh, and he's left handed.**

**Height: 6'1 ft.**

**Hair-Unkempt, Longish, Sandy Brown**

**Personality-Appears unfriendly even though he isn't, Has a temper, Been in a fight before, Tends to keep to himself, More trusting than he'd like to admit, Has a much softer side to him but refuses to show it.**

**History-Born in the country, moved to the city, kicked out and lived on the streets for several years (at least since 11), Used to fight with fists to survive and still does.**

**Extra Info-Incredibly strong willed, He is not the kind to ever give up, even if he loses, Already shaves once a day.**

**Why he wants to win-To pay for his brother's drug rehab and get himself an education, though most people think he wants it as a way to flip off his mom for kicking him out.**

**Pokemon-Bisharp, Magnezone, Seadra, Muk, Crobat, Vibrava.**

**Subs-(Ghastly and Deino)**

* * *

><p><strong>Name - Canus Meloti<strong>

**Age - 18**

**Appearance - Auburn Hair, dark blue eyes, skinny. Wears a gray suit with golden buttons.**

**Height - 6'0**

**Hair - Combed and gelled. Wears a train cap he got from the Gear Station**

**Personality - Humble, kind, loves a challenge, but knows when to pull back. Very patient and smiles a lot**

**History - After his family moved to Unova from Hoenn, his father made him work in the Gear Station. He still works there, but recently, his grandfather died, who left him a huge inheritance. His father, thinking his son will become lazy just because he now has all the money in the world, makes him compete in a tournament to motivate him to work hard in life.**

****Extra Info - Has a sister named Lyra, who is traveling in Sinnoh. Very close to his Ferrothorn, which saved him once during a train wreck. Wears a golden necklace with a stopwatch, a thorn from his Ferrothorn, and his sister's lucky Victini charm.****

****Why they want to win - To prove to his father.**  
><strong>

**Pokemon: Ferrothorn(Feyhorn), Stoutland(Landon), Solosis(Luna), Breloom(Bree), Flygon(Lakon), and Jolteon(Coltic) EXTRA: Chandelure(Lurewick) and Claydol(Twindle)**

* * *

><p><strong>Name- Sunny Allen<strong>

** Age- 14**

** Appearance- LIKE A BOSS! She has blonde hair an blue eyes (like a typical Swedish person) and she wears all yellow (shirt and shorts) and flip flops. Purple**

** Flip flops. ('cuz I feels like it!)**

** Height- 5'6 ft.**

** Hair (style, color, other features) Uhh, blonde. Oh, it's in two long ponytails.**

** Personality- Spaztic. Crazy. Hyperactive. She knows how to kill someone three different ways with her purple flip flops. She is afraid of Magikarp because she believes they have magic spaghetti powers.**

** History- A charming Johto girl without a tragic backstory (HURRAH!). She has a sister named Burnadette in Lavaridge who taught her everything she knows and more.**

****Extra info- Again, she can use her flip flops like weapons (they're better than throwing knives, no joke) and... Likes to pretend she is a Paras sometimes. Has a certain fondness for Tiramisu and sleeping bags.****

** Why they want to win- So she can be famous. Duh. And so she can meet people an lick their shoes.**

** Pokémon (X6, X2 Substitutes) MAIN TEAM: A Golbat named Fang, a male Bellossom (who loves being a Bellossom) named Dark Lord Kostellor IX, a Butterfree named Anamaria, an emo Mawile named Cookies, a Golem named Fluffy, and a Nidorina without a name. SUBS: A Weedle named Jorge and a Pidgey named Glitter.**

* * *

><p><strong>Name: Suzanna Lovelorn<strong>

** Age: sixteen**

** Appearance: Average height. Camo shorts with sandals. She is wears a coffin necklace and a necklace that looks like a skeleton key. She also wears a camo hat.**

** Hair: Medium length hair. Brown with red highlights. Somewhat curly. **

** Personality: Calm with random outbursts. She is a music lover. Not very argumentative. **

** History: Middle sibling between one brother and one sister. The older brother being accident prone made her learn basic first aid. The younger sister has ADHD so she is tolerable of others. She left home as soon as she could. **

** Extra info: She is always with her ipod. If anything happens to it she turns evil and tries to kill everyone. The only way to stop her is to have her sit and listen to music. Get ipod as soon as possible.**

** Why: She was bored and needed something to do.**

** Pokemon: Fearow (Antonio),Dusknoir (Frenchy), Klang (Clockwork), Heatmor (Mori),Kingler (Queenie), and Cherubi (Sakura)**

* * *

><p><strong>Name- Fredrick (Fred)<strong>

** Age- 23**

** Appearance- Really creepy nerdy guy with huge braces and thick rimmed glasses. Wears a button up shirt and a bolo tie. Has rainbow suspenders.**

** Hair- nerdy smooth with cowlick**

** Personality- geeky fanfiction driven guy with an obsession for crack**

** History- lived in his mother's basement after his numerous rejections from girls.**

**Extra info- he is a black belt... Not sure how he got it considering he is such a pansy...**

** He wants to win because he 1) needs the money because his mom kicked him out of the basement, 2) it will impress girls.**

** He was dropped on his head numerous times when he was a baby.**

** Pokemon- Magicarp, Rattata, Metapod, Bellsprout, Eevee, and Diglett**

** Subs are Meowth and Togepi.**

* * *

><p><strong>Name: Cloud Twilight<strong>

**Age: 16**

**Gender: male**

**Height: 6.2 but slim build.**

**Looks/Attire: Cloud has spikey brown hair, blue-gray eyes ( the right has a scar running down it), Cloud wears a sleeveless black shirt with white baggy pants tucked into black boots, he also wears black gloves.**

**Extra-info: he hates being the victim of cheats and prefers to play by the rules.**

**Reasons: to prove to people he's not just some push-over from Unova, and to hopefully settle down with someone in the future. And also because he's broke because no one wants to battle him for "unknown" reasons.**

**History: he left home at ten and has spent the last six years traveling the regions, completing gyms, battling trainers and traveling with his friends and ofcourse taking on the leagues with no apsuloot wins yet. ( meaning he gets through a few rounds then he gets beaten)**

****Pokemon: battle team: a Riolu called Shadow, a Pikachu named Lec, a Braviary, a Infernape called Blaze, a Grovyle named Blade, a Totodile (not sure with spelling it's the Johto water starter), back-ups: a Absol called Soul and a Lucario called Aura.****

* * *

><p><strong><strong>Name: Nathan Periwinkle<br>Age: 14  
>Height: 5,5<strong>**

****Appearance: Black hair with a purple streak, permanant evil smirk, green eyes, palish complexion.  
>Clothes: Tshirt with a Ghastly with it's tongue out on, black skinny jeans with a Duskull belt, black hoodie, black Doc Martins.<strong>**

****Personality: Compulsive prankster. Sarcastic sense of humor and takes every joke too far. Finds almost everything hilarious, but is always cutting in his remarks and enjoys a good argument. Never stops smirking. Also a bit of a flirt. Pranks and practical jokes 24/7. Sour loser, but gets over it (eventually). Boasts when he wins. In short, an arrogant, cocky, b*stard.****

****Pokemanz: ****

****Banette named C.O.D (Creature Of Darkness) or Cod, as he's known. (male)****

**Gengar named Teaser (male)**

****Spiritomb named Creepster (male)****

**Cofagrious named Midnight (Female)**

**Jellicent named The Floating Moustache (male)**

**Driftblim named Maka (female)**

**RESERVES:**

**Dusknoir named Lord Death (male)**

**Golurk named O-Matic (male)**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 8: Ceremonial Stupidity<br>**

* * *

><p>Somewhere, deep within the bowels of the earth, sat a very dark and shadowy secret base. I can't really describe it to you, 'cause the base is so dark, you can't see a thing. And that's because the owner of said base is a stingy miser who won't replace light bulbs when they blow out!<p>

Speaking of which, I can describe his activities a little bit. You see, the only source of light in the entire base was sixteen computer monitors. And they were monitoring, you guessed it, the Tourney's contestants! Our apparently evil and mysterious friend here was watching them via little spy cameras set up throughout Duran.

He watched our "heroes" with amusement in his computer chair made from tapioca pudding. Our shadowy manipulator stroked a Pokémon that looked like some sort of sick mix between a Buneary and a Magikarp on his lap. He turned his head slightly when he realized that his trusty (and shadowy) minion had returned from is latest mission.

"AH," said the leader, "How did it go?"

"..."

"Crap, She was a normal girl? But her name was Mary Sue! No normal girl is named Mary Sue!"

"..."

"Don't get all sarcastic on me! When you realized that she wasn't one, did you dispose of her?"

"..."

"You left no evidence, right? I mean, if people caught wind of our plan, then that would mean game over!"

"..."

"No, I don't take you for an idiot! You made sure all of the contestants would know about the tournament _and_ made sure that they would join!"

"..."

The man sighed. "Okay, you can have a cookie. But just one! You know what happens when you have too much sugar! Do you remember how long it took to cover up the mass genocide of Twilight fangirls? Anyway, now that they're all here, we just need to wait while they pick each other off, one by one! Then we'll take the winner and the world will be ours!"

"..." His minion crossed his arms.

"What do you mean I'm being unnecessarily vague about our plan? You know what it is, don't you? Why do I need to flat out state what our plan is over and over and over again?"

"..."

"Good point. I'd better call Ebony and have her set the hotel scheme up..." He tried to reach for a cell phone, but his fingers instead met a Rattata trap. He began to shake his fingers quickly, trying to shake the trap off of him. "Gah! Stupid flippin' Rattata traps!"

"..."

"I will NOT buy more light bulbs! Ebony kept giving me hell about how "Lihgttt balbzzz r 4 prepz!11!" I still don't know why she needs to pronounce the ones when she exclaims!"

"..."

"Just get the butter, will you?"

* * *

><p><strong>Meanwhile, at the I Haz Cheezbuger Stadium...<strong>

* * *

><p>All sixteen contestants stood side by side in the middle of the stadium. Standing in front of them was the announcer for the whole thing, Lance the former champion. The stadium looked relatively normal. The ground beneath them was dirt, with the usual chalk drawings used to draw the fields lines. The seats were all cushioned and looked like they came from a movie theater. There stood four crystalline towers in the four corners of the stadium. All sorts of people were sitting in the seats, watching the opening ceremony.<strong><br>**

"All of you are here today because of your love of Pokémon. And starting tomorrow, you will begin your battles against each other. But first, you must rest and think of strategies! I will root for all of you!" He announced enthusiastically.

Of course, not a one of them was paying any attention whatsoever.

Sunny was without her sister and her "Baby-Puppy", which depressed her.

Mikey was once again checking Dakota out, much to the his chagrin.

Angel was sipping some "imported soda" from his flask while Ember was playing her guitar to the rhythm of a Britney Spears song.

Lacete was looking at herself in the mirror.

Gingersnap stared of into space.

Mathias played with his bucky balls. (Still don't know what that is.)

Nathan was spitting spit balls at Canus and Cloud.

Fred was writing very dirty fanfiction with his laptop.

Trista was reading Fred's dirty fanfiction on her cell phone.

Suzana listened to "Barney the Dinosaur"'s theme in G-major on her I-pod.

Ken was talking on his Xtransciever with his would be girlfriend.

Marcus was somehow able to sleep while standing.

"Um, Hello?" Lance waved his hand. "Anyone listening?" Nope. No one was. Lance face palmed. "Oh, Arceus! I used to be the champion! Now I'm stuck babysitting these morons!"

"I'm actually a woman!" Lance shouted in the vain hope of catching the contestants attention. And no one payed attention still. Lance sighed and pulled a bull horn out of his back pocket. He held it front of him and pushed the trigger, releasing a loud sound that caught the attention of the contestants.

"Are you all listening? Good," Lance said with a triumphant smile on his face. "Now, I would like to introduce you to the woman who is sponsoring this entire tournament! Miss Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way, the founder of Goff Corp!" Lance motioned to a a young woman in Gothic clothing who was standing behind him.

She walked out in front of the contestants, and with a hand on her hip, said, "Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. and-"

A few contestants began whispering among themselves.

Canus held his ears. "My Arceus! I can somehow hear the bad selling of her words," He whispered to Gingersnap, who stared at the mega-sue in confused awe. "Why is she describing her looks to us?" Dakota asked Mikey, who shrugged.

Angel almost choked on his "imported soda", while Ember tried to play her guitar loud enough to drown Ebony's ramblings out.

Ebony's face went red, and screeched in an unearthly pitch, "PREPZ!111111!11!" This got everyone to shut up and stare at the poorly conceived fan character.

Ebony cleared her throat. "ANEWAYZ! I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow."

Lance stared at the Mary Sue in confusion, trying to make heads and tails of why she just said that. "Anyway," Lance began awkwardly, "Okay..." and then he shook his head. "Well, everyone, If you would follow this gentleman to the Censored Hotel, you can get situated in your rooms."

A young man accompanied by a Gardevoir then came from behind them. The expression on the boys face was monotone. His hair was completely covered by a hat that resembled an Umbreon, a black tank top, black jeans, and red sandals. He was kinda on the short side. He didn't say a word as he motioned for the contestants to follow him.

* * *

><p><strong>At the Censored Hotel...<strong>

* * *

><p>The Censored Hotel was just like it sounded like. It was one giant black bar with the word "Censored" in white running down it.<p>

They followed the young man into the lobby of the hotel, which looked like a generic hotel lobby, and thus, I don't feel like I should describe it in depth.

The boy went to the front desk, and returned a moment later with sixteen room keys. After he handed a key to reach contestant, a voice echoed inside their heads, saying, _'Here are your room keys, everyone. They should have you room numbers printed on them. Now, a dinner has been arranged at six at the hotels restaurant.'  
><em>

Cloud grabbed his head and groaned. He, and the others felt an intruding, pinching sensation in their brains. "Dafuq is going on?"_  
><em>

Suzana screeched. "The voices are back in my head!"

_'I must apologize. You see, I am mute,'_ The young man gestured to himself. _'And thus, I use my Gardevoir to communicate via telepathy.'_

"Dude! It feels like you touched me inappropriately with you brain!" Nathan groaned, rubbing his temples.

_'I apologize. Now, I have other matters to attend to. I trust that you can find your rooms,'_ And with that the young man bowed and left the hotel, leaving the contestants to their own devices.

* * *

><p>Fred immediately walked up closely behind Lacete and breathed heavily. Lacete looked over cautiously and said in a creeped out voice, "Dude, I'm twelve! I know that I'm a beautiful goddess and all... but you're gross!"<p>

Fred giggled creepily. "You're a loli..."

Ember, reaching her boiling point, said to Angel, "Ange, remember when I said I was going to stab that nerd in the crotch? Well, I need the knife you keep hidden in your back pocket."

"No need," Lacete said, just before she turned and kneed Fred in the groin. "I don't need to be saved by a wannabe rock star."

"AM NOT!" Ember said, rolling up hers sleeves. She tackled Lacate and began to pull on her hair.

* * *

><p>For one reason or another everyone ignored this, and chatted amongst themselves.<p>

Sari and N managed to catch up to Sunny, and they began talking.

"So, what was up with that Enoby-whatsherface, anyway?" Sari asked.

Sunny shrugged. "I dunno. She's a weirdo, that's for sure." She spoke as if she had room to judge.

Trista hastily walked up to the trio and poked N lightly in the face. "Um... Is this a bishounen?"

"Yep!" Sunny said smugly.

"He's... so pretty! Where did you find him?"

"He fell out of the sky."

N raised a finger to correct Sunny. 'Actually, I crashed my Reshiram. Speaking of which, where-"

"He fell out of the sky,' Sunny reiterated, this time in a more menacing tone.

N squeaked in fear.

"So," Nathan began as he slung an arm over Mathias. "You look like the kind of guy who would pull some wicked pranks. With that being said, want to go stink bomb the entire hotel?"

Mathias' mind was blown. He already made a friend who would actually be fun! He grinned and said, "What are we waiting for?"

* * *

><p>Dakota had just about had it. Mikey kept staring at him, and at this point, he was very uncomfortable.<p>

"Okay! Dude, why do you keep staring at me?"

"Well... You're very attractive..." Mikey, looked down at his feet and blushed.

Dakota was about to say something, but stopped before anything came out of his mouth. That was probably the nicest thing anyone has every said to him. And come to think of it, the only thing bothering him was the staring. And Mikey WAS pretty cute...

Just then, Suzana came and shoved Dakota to the floor. She then yelled, "No Shonen Ai! This is crack fanfiction, bitch!" She turned to Mikey and asked in an irritated voice, "Good Arceus, man! Don't you realize that the Author doesn't have time for developing romance?

"Sorry..."

"Sorry doesn't cut it! The author can't write something serious, or his brain will explode!"

* * *

><p>Angel finally decided to stop drinking long enough to pull Ember off of Lacete. "Lady dude, you've got to control your temper! I can't keep you from getting hurt all the time!"<p>

"She keeps saying that I'm not a rock star! I totally am!"

"No, you're not. That's why you came here, remember? To show off your guitar skills on TV?"

"LIAR!"

Angel sighed and did a face palm.

* * *

><p><strong>Later, at the restaurant...<strong>

* * *

><p>The restaurant itself was more or less the typical fancy stereotype you would expect, with pretty cyrstal chandeliers, white tables cloths and such. The constants (and Sunny's posse) all sat down at a rather long table that was large enough to seat them all. (Redundancy is redundant) Now, I'm pretty sure that none of you want to know what's on the menu, right? It's just food. Fancy food that the tourney is paying for.<p>

Ahem, now onto the point!

As they all waited for food, an ominous person who was ominous and redundant watched them from afar. He looked to the Pokémon by his side, and pointed at them. The floating creature understood it's mission, and floated towards the unsuspecting people.

* * *

><p>"Damn, woman! I didn't know you could stuff that much bread in you mouth!" Nathan exclaimed in awe at Suzanas' "talent". "How'd ja do that?"<p>

"Ancient ninja secret," Suzana said casually.

Just then, a floating Pokémon that looked vaguely like a fetus came up to the table.

"Whose that Pokémon?" everyone but N asked in unison.

"It's... Musharna!" N declared. "Wait... We're in Kanto aren't we? Musharna's aren't indegionous to this region!"

Before anyone could say anything else, Musharna cried, releasing a pinkish mist onto our "heroes"...

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Ha! I managed to get it out before weeks end! Anyway, I apologize if I offended anyone.**

**And I promise, next chapter, the WILL be a battle! Also, Ebony belongs to the author of "My Immortal", not me!  
><strong>

**Shonen Ai= boy love  
><strong>

**Bishonen= pretty boy  
><strong>

**Just in case you were wondering...  
><strong>

**Next Time: Ember VS Nathan!  
><strong>

**Please review!  
><strong>


	9. Sardonic Song

**A/n: Hello, everybody! Before we begin, I would like recommend a story to all of you who are MLP fans. It's written by my close friend, Insanitypony, and it's called Shitstorm Brewing. It's really crazy and worth a laugh. Also, I'm writing a few chapters for it. So please check it out and review it if you're interested!  
><strong>

**Now, let's get on with it!  
><strong>

**Chapter 9: Sardonic Song  
><strong>

* * *

><p>Dakota woke up with a slight headache. His senses quickly came to him, and he soon became aware of his surroundings. He was in a soft, king sized bed, under a heavy blanket. And, for whatever reason, the carpet, paint, bed and sheets were a pure white in color. From what he could tell, he was in his hotel room. A foul stench reached his nose. It smelled like... rotten eggs?<p>

Dakota felt movement in the spot next to him. He looked over to see the sleeping form of Mikey.

...

...

Wait, Mikey?

Dakota quickly peaked under the covers. Just as he feared. He wore no pants.

Dakota stared at the wall opposite to the bed, a wide range of thoughts ran through his head, all summing up to a single question:

WHAT THE FRENCH TOAST HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?

* * *

><p>Sunny didn't know why she sat in a tub full of tiramisu, but she was glad she was. That meant she got free food! She scooped a chunk and began eating it.<p>

Lacete stared at Sunny with a blank look on her face. "What are you doing in my bathtub?"

"Eating tiramisu," Sunny said nonchalantly.

"In a bathtub. No, MY bathtub?"

"Yup..."

"Well, get out! I need to take a shower! I smell like a muk making godless love to a garbodor!" Lacete yanked Sunny, who was thankfully fully clothed, out of the dessert-filled tub.

"Jeez, fine!" Sunny crouched, starting her Paras impression again. And she left the bathroom.

"Crazy bitca," Lacete murmured. She turned on the gold plated bath tub's faucet. The tiramisu grew soggy under the water, with the less than solid parts starting to flush into the drain. Unfortunately, the solid parts remained. Lacete sighed. Looks like she would have to call room service or something. But she vowed to take a bath!

Too bad she was too much of an impatient little scamp to wait.

Lacete walked out of her hotel room, looking left and right down the hallway, which was littered with soda cans. The air had a strong smell of rotten eggs. Lacete went to the hotel room door that was closest to her right, and knocked.

Angel, who was wearing nothing but a coconut bra and khakis, opened it. Rubbing the sleep from his left eye, Angel asked, "You... What do you want?"

Lacete pushed Angel aside and entered his room. "I, Lacete, need your help, drunken peasant! You see, despite the fact that I am non-mary-sue perfection embodied, I still collect dirt and germs upon my glorious dermis. And thus, at times, I will begin to smell unfavorably. This is one of those times." Lacete looked up at the ceiling and raised her arms to encompass her glory.

Angel cocked an eyebrow. "So what, you want to use my shower? Don't you have one in your room?"

"I would use my own, if not for that insufferable flip-flop weirdo! You see, she defiled my tub with her tiramisu!" Lacete's eye twitched slightly.

"Uh-huh..." Angel looked at her with a mix of contempt and boredom. "Why should I help you? You've done nothing but irritate my best friend. I know she's driven me insane on multiple occasions, but the principle still stands!"

Lacete rubbed her chin. "Should we battle in the tournament, I will not use my strongest Pokemon!"

Angel snorted in defiance. "That reward is purely circumstantial! Neither of us has any way of knowing who would fight who!"

"Crap, you're right! Hmm... I know, how about I give you a lil' somesing somesing." Lacete pulled up her kimono and stuck out her leg a bit.

"Ugh! Gross! How old are you, twelve? I'm not a pedo, crazy!" Angel spat. He glared at Lacete, who stared back at him blankly.

Lacete lowered her kimono. "I wouldn't let you touch me anyway. I was going to trick you, then run off."

Angel faced palmed, and pointed at the door. "Get out."

"All right! I'll leave!" As Lacete reached the doorway, she turned and asked Angel, "Before I go, I gotta ask: What's with the coconut bra?"

Angel looked down at his chest in confusion. "Huh? How did I not notice that before?" His hand cupped the shell on his right breast, and jiggled it. He winced. "Okay, it's starting to chafe."

Unamused, Lacete backed out of Angels' room, continuing her search for a shower she could use.

* * *

><p>All things considered, Nathan had an awesome night. Sure, he didn't remember a thing, but that didn't mean he didn't have fun! Judging from the smell that wafted throughout the hotel, he manged to set of a whole bunch of stink bombs!<p>

Although... That doesn't explain why he's sitting in a laundry bin...

_Ring, Ring! _A ringing noise emanated from Nathan's pocket. He reached in it, and pulled the ringing... thingy, out. It was his cellphone. The alarm clock went off on it. That meant it was time for the tournament to start. Wearing a tricksters smirk, Nathan burst out from under the laundry and stretched. Then he noticed something... peculiar.

The bin wasn't in the laundry room... It was in a hotel room! Specifically, Sunny's!

Sunny sat on her bed, directly across from the bin, chewing on a sock, and she was covered in tiramisu. Before Nathan could react, Sunny threw one of her flip flops, which only nearly missed his face by a millimeter, and it embedded itself into the wall behind him.

Sunny glared at Nathan. "What's with people in this town and stalking me?" She asked as she spat out the sock. "Maybe I should just eat you people so you can leave me alone," She took a fork out of hammer space.

Nathan just stared at her for a moment, then looked at his phone, and said, "Well, would you look at the time!" He jumped out of the laundry bin and out of the room.

* * *

><p>Nathan ran as fast as his pale legs could go. Out of the hotel, to the stadium. Lance once again stood at the center of it, with psycho "goff" Enodi standing at his side.<p>

Only the people mentioned previously in this chapter were there, oddly enough. All of them stood in a row before Lance and Taebory. Sunny looked back at Nathan, and said in a snarky tone, "Well, if it isn't the pervert who defiled my laundry collection!"

"I'm not a pervert!" Nathan shouted as he took a place in line next to Dakota, who was trying to piece together what had happened still. "And how did you get here before me?!"

"Magic," She snorted.

Nathan raised one of his eyebrows. What was with this chick? He made a mental note to put fire crackers in her toilet later.

Lance cleared his throat. 'Well, everyone, we've been waiting eight chapters, but now we're finally going to get to what the author promised us in the first place: a Pokémon battle!" The crowd cheered. We truly are getting the show on the road for the first time!

"Now, let's pick our first battlers, shall we?" Lance gestured towards the sky, where a giant TV screen appeared from behind nothing much!

On the screen were two windows, flashing various battlers faces like a slot machine. It went through various faces for about a minute, but stopped. The two chosen to battle to the death (not really) was... Ember and Nathan! (Duh) ArtemisisSymmetrical whooped from the stands.

As the contestants cleared out to the stands, Lance and Eboni took seats behind that look like the ones judges use in Pokémon contests. Nathan walked to and then stood on the right side of the battlefield, waiting for his opponent.

After five minutes, everyone began to get bored.

"Where is she!?" Nathan whined.

Just then, Something burst from the ground on the other side of the field. It was Ember. She was only visible from the waist up, as everything bellow that was underground.

"Hey, Where were you!? You should have gotten here on time!" Angel, now free of his fruity bondage, asked from the seats.

"Iwaskidnappedbytrollsbutthen Krabby-PeoplesavedmeandthenIbecamet hequeenoftheirundergroundcit ybutthenIrealizedthatIneeded toshowtheworldmytalentsatthe tournamentbuttheKrabby-Peoplewouldn'tletmegosoIdugmywaytofreedom withaspoonandhereIamnow!" Ember said rapidly, and in one breath.

"Uh... Okay," Nathan looked at Ember, one eyebrow raised.

Angel face palmed. "She got a stain on her shirt and had to change it," he translated, whilst pulling his flask out of his pocket.

"WHAT EVA FOOKIN PREPZ!11!" Enony shooted angrily. "JUS GET TE BATTLE ON WIT ALREDI!111!" Geddit? Cause she's goffic? No? Me neither.

Nathan withdrew a Pokéball from the latch on his belt. "Are we going to battle or just keep yackin' the rest of the chapter?"

Ember, who had managed to dig her way out of the ground completely, raised one as well. "Yeah we should get to it. I've got a hot date with Forrest Gump."

Lance, through a microphone that was placed in front of his seat, declared, "Ladies and gentlemen, this will be a three on three battle! Who ever knocks out all three of their opponent's Pokémon will be the winner! Now, three!"

"Two!" the crowd counted down in unison.

"One!"

"Let's go!" Ember and Nathan shouted.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Prankster Nathan VS. Garage Rocker Ember<em>**

* * *

><p>Their pokéballs flew through the air, and released the creatures hidden inside.<p>

"Teaser!" Nathan shouted. A purple, gaseous mon came out of the ball. It had a large grin on it's face and detached hands. A Haunter. He let out a creepy cackle from

"Nuts!" And a squirrel-like Pokémon raced from his container. It chattered in some squirrely language about, well, nuts. The food kind, not the other, you sickos. He was a pachirisu.

"I'll go first!" Nathan declared. "Teaser! Use Poison Jab!"

Teaser's movement was swift, he reached Nut within seconds, and with it's hand, which glowed a lighter shade of purple, struck the smaller Pokémon. Nuts flew back by about a foot, flinching.

Nathans eyes lit up as his prankster's smirk grew on his face. "Hey, Teaser, do that again!"

Teaser, obeying his trainer, willed his hand to glow again, and prepared to attack Nuts again.

"Scurry."

And just like that, Nuts had disappeared. Haunter canceled his attack and looked around. Nathan grimaced. What sort of attack was this?

He suddenly heard a familiar chattering noise. Nathan looked directly above Teaser, and stifled a gasp.

"Discharge."

Nuts unleashed a massive wave of electricity, which struck Teaser dead-on.

"HAUNTHAUNTHAUNTHAUNTHAUNT!" Teaser shrieked as he was filled with pure energy.

After his assault, Nuts landed right in front of Teaser, chattering, _"You ain't gonna get yo' hand on deez nuts!"  
><em>

Haunter shook his head (or whatever his equivalent was) to shake off the effects of the discharge. _"What nuts? What choo talkin' bout, Pachi?"__  
><em>

Nathan looked on, in a light shock, then looked to Ember. "What was that?! Some new attack?"_  
><em>

Ember chuckled as she shook her head. "Yes, my little prankster! Scurry is a new move I made up myself! You can't hope to beat me as long as I can use it!"

Sunny, who wasn't buying a word of what Ember had said, looked to the seat at her right, and asked Angel, "Hey, what's really going on out there?"

Angel groaned lightly, and then said, "This "Scurry" attack is really just her Pachirisu's ability, Run Away. It boosts Nut's speed so he can escape his opponents. She's just saying those things because she's a frikin' liar."

"Sweet."

""Sweet"? How so?"

"Think about it; We have a liar and a prankster, both are going to be using crazy tactics to battle with."

Teaser began to lose his patience. He repeated his attack over and over, yet Nut's was able to dodge each strike.

Nathan growled. "Teaser, use Brick Break!"

Teaser's hands glowed white, and charged at Nuts, in an attempt to, well, break him. However, Nut managed to dodge it _still._

"Come one, Teaser! Fight like you mean it!"

He tried, but to no avail. That... that... squirrel-thing kept dodging!

_"Stop dodging and let me hit you!"_ Teaser begged in his native tongue as he charged at Nuts.

_"Okee-dokee!"_ Nuts complied cheerfully. He then cheerfully jumped in _front _of Teaser, allowing himself to be hit by the Brick Break. Nuts then did fly in the opposite direction as a direct result of being hit by Teaser.

_"That was... stupid,"_ Nathan thought. _"And sooooooo boring! This fights been nothing but dodging! And I don't want to win like this either!" _Nathan began scratching his head furiously with both hands as he wracked his brain for ideas as to how to both win _and _make the battle fun.

Suddenly, a light bulb went off inside his head! Nathan smiled, snapped his fingers, and proudly declared, "Prank war!"

Both Teaser and Nuts ceased their fighting to look at him.

Eforly got a dude-you're-so-retarded look on her face. "Wut!?111" she asked sexilly.

Ember looked on, her face held an expression of mild amusement.

Nathan ignored the staring and ordered, "Teaser, prank time!"

Teaser grinned, understanding what his trainer was saying completely. Teaser reached into hammer space (which is a power nearly everyone has in my world) and pulled out two pies, one in each hand.

"You ready, Teaser?"

"Haunter!" Teaser said in confirmation. Then, with lightning fast, speed, threw a pie at Nuts, hitting him square in the face.

Nuts, now lying on his back, licked as much pie he could off of his face. _"Mmm. Oran pie!" _Nuts jumped up gleefully, practically shouting, _"I want more pie!" _

Now, for those of you who know anything about the series, it would be obvious that Oran berries are used for healing, and because of that, using a pie made out of them as a weapon is generally a bad idea.

Nuts jumped up, a portion of his health restored.

And for the next hour, Nathan and Teaser had tried all sorts of pranks in an effort to defeat Nuts. Joy buzzers, whoopee cushions, stink bombs, spicy gum, C4 explosives, and banana peels. But, somehow, none of this affected that damn squirrel!

Nathan sighed at his failed attempt at a prank war. Pranking was usually one of his strong points. Why isn't it working now?

Ember watched the battle field, bored. This stupid battle had been going on for too long. Really, she hasn't even gotten the opportunity to show off her epic guitar skills yet, so she decided to end it.

"Nuts!" She shouted, getting the attention of her ADD addled Pokémon. "Let's end this! Electro Ball!"

_"Kay!"_ Nuts began to gather a ball of electrical energy at the tip of his tail.

"Oh, no you don't!" Nathan shouted. "Teaser, Shadow Ball!" And Teaser began to create a ball of, well... shadows in his hands.

Then the two mons charged at each other, releasing their respecting balls. The attacks collided, creating a small explosion that engulfed them, followed by a large cloud of dust. (A totally original and not cliche event that's used to build a false sense of dramatic tension.)

"Teaser!" Nathan cried.

"Nuts!" Ember also cried.

The dust cloud had cleared, revealing the results of the battle. Neither Nuts nor Teaser had won. their attacks had knocked each other out.

"Crap," Nathan muttered in disappointment whilst looking at the ground. He held out Teaser's Pokéball. "Return." And in a flash of red light, Teaser was back in it. "You did good." He said to the ball.

Ember pouted slightly and shook her head a bit. She also returned Nuts. "Rest well, little guy. We'll be idols yet."

She then called out to Nathan. "Hey, prankster dude! You wanna know how I got these scars?"  
>She motioned to her scarred face which wasn't actually scarred.<p>

"What scars? I don't see any," Nathan squinted in attempt to get a better look at her face.

"Well, My mother loved tauros' so much to the point where she refused to defend herself against one when it was trying to kill her. After she died from that, I vowed revenge against all Pokémon everywhere! I tried to kill a ninetails, but it cursed my so that my soul would burn like a flame for all eternity!"

"Then how are you here? Why are you using Pokémon?"

"Because shut up."

Nathan merely shook his head as he and Ember took out their Pokéballs.

"Go, Roid!" Ember sent out a Machoke.

"Go, Midnight!" Nathan had sent out a Chandelure.

"Roid, use Foresight!" A large magnifying appeared over Midnight for a split second, then disappeared. "Now, use DynamicPunch!" Roid's fist glowed with a reddish energy, and before Midnight could react, she was punched in her face, causing an epic explosion. This lead to an anticlimactic K.O.

Nathan's eye twitched at this. That... was just stupid! He should be winning this! He shouldn't be some no-name liar's bitch!

Meanwhile, on the other side of the field, Roid wasn't faring too well. Unfortunately for him, Midnights ability was Flame Body, which left a rather nasty burn on his fist. (In the shape of a tangelo, no less)

Nathan noticed and smirked. "Looks like your Roid just got burned."

"Ha! This is nothing! You only have one pokémon left while I still have two!"

Nathan continued to smirk. 'Whatever you say, lady. What ever you say." He pulled out another Pokéball, and threw it. "Go, Creepster!" And out of the ball came a Spiritomb. It felt as though the creature was covered with a foul aura, almost pure evil. He floated uncomfortably close to Roid, staring him down. He was understandably freaked out by this, as he backed up a few feet.

"Roid, Use Fore-"

"Creepster, use Dark Pulse!" Creepster quickly created a few rings made of dark energy and collected them into a sphere like form, blasting Roid point-blank and causing a minor explosion.

"Roid!" Ember shouted, but was immediately relieved to see he was (relatively) okay as the smoke cleared. He was hunched slightly, and his breathing as a bit heavy, but overall, he was okay. "Heh," She giggled slightly. "Hey, Dummy! You do realize Dark-type moves don't work well on Fighting-types, right?"

"Doesn't matter. Look." Ember noticed Roid wincing in pain. Of course! The burn he sustained from Midnight. That little freak must be be waiting the battle out so that Roid would faint from the burn!

Ember scowled. "You're a lot better than I thought kid." She raised her right arm above her head. "It looks like I'll have to take you seriously." Then, out of Hammer space, Ember materialized her guitar into her hand. "Let me play your swan song." She began strumming her guitar, singing.

_"La da da da da,"_

Roid abruptly stood up straight, his breathing returning to a normal pace.

_"I'm gonna bury you in the ground."_

A large magnifying glass appeared over Creepster, presumably the move Foresight.

_"La da da da da, I'm gonna bury you with my sound."_

Roid removed his Power-Save belt, which may I remind you _limits_ a machoke's strength. After doing this, his muscle size increased dramatically. He was twice as large then when he started out.

_"I'm gonna drain the red from you pretty pink face. I'm gonna-"_

"What the glorble glop are you doing?!" Nathan rudely interrupted Ember's song.

Ember chuckled softly as she looked down at her instrument. "Y'see, I trained my pokémon with my sweet songs. They're in tune with _my_ tunes, as it were. And when I bring out my guitar, we're in full synch, baby!" She struck a low chord, signaling Roid to charge forward.

Nathan's eye twitched. "I don't care if you have some weird battling style! I'll take you down all the same! Creepster, Sucker Punch!"

Creepster sprouted a tendril made out of the purple... stuff that composed most of his body, preparing to slam it into Roid.

_"Sorry I don't treat you like a goddess, is that what you want me to do~?" _Ember began to sing again.

"I. Am not. A girl!"

Roid's fist and Creepster's tentacle-thing slammed into each other, causing yet another explosion, albeit minor.

_"Sorry I don't treat you like you're perfect, like all your little subjects do._

_Sorry I'm not made of sugar, that I'm not sweet enough for you~"_

Despite being blown back a bit, Roid didn't seem to have taken any damage. He crossed his arms in an "X" formation, preparing to use Cross Chop.

_"Is that why you always avoid me? That must be such and inconvenience to you! Well..."_

Creepster leaped into the air, charging up a Dark Pulse. "Spin!" Nathan ordered. Creepster complied, spinning rapidly as it released the Dark Pulse over his body, wrapping himself in an unwrapable sphere of darkness. Roid also leaped up, and struck the sphere with his mighty arms. For a moment, there was a struggle, but soon the sphere began to form cracks. At first, they were tiny, almost microscopic, then slowly but surely, they began to spread; they began to grow. And soon, the entire ball of darkness was covered in cracks.

_"I'm just your problem..."_

_Crash! _The black shield Creepster created had shattered like glass. The pieces evaporated as they fell to the ground, now useless. Roid's attack made contact and sent Creepster flying into the stadium wall behind Nathan.

Nathan only let out a small gasp as a reaction to what happened. Creepster let out a sigh of defeat before falling unconscious.

"And with that," Lance announced into the microphone, "Creepster is unable to battle! The winner is Ember Kingsley!"

"FOokn prep," Egoly muttered sexily. "Dat KAWAII emo boI shud hav 1."

Ember, who had been absorbed with her song, had just noticed her victory. She let a small, but still noticable sigh. "Oh? It's over already? I didn't get to finish my song... Oh well. Hey, pale kid!"

"Return," Nathan muttered as he put Creepster back in his ball. His gaze was a bit empty due to the shock of losing to a wannabe rockstar like Ember. (Who totally should have lost.) "Hmm?" He turn to look at Ember.

"Don't look down, guy! It isn't your fault that you lost; It was just destiny! You see, I was destined since birth to become the most famous star in the world! And nothing can stand in my way, lest they be crushed!" She looked to the sky, her arms raised in a dramatic fashion.

"Hehehe," She started to giggle, but it soon turned to manic laughter. "Ah... AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Good. F**king. Arceus. I HATE this chapter! I've never done a fight scene before, so I don't know how well this turned out. I had to keep editing this thing down & fixing it! It's fraking massive! (Over 4,000 words! That's a LOT for me...)**

**The song Ember sings is "I'm just your problem" written by the lovely people behind Adventure Time, which I don not own. (And Ember can't sing as well as Marceline. That OC of mine sounds like Rebbecca Black.)  
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**Anyway, everyone, I'm so sorry for being late. I've been caught up in a lot of stuff lately. (for like five moths, no less) Like, I went to see ParaNorman (Awesome movie. Buy the DVD) for Anticsareme's birthday, then BW2 came out, so I had to beat that, (Got Genesect! Awesome.) then I've been getting into a show called Gravity Falls (Awesome show. I can't help but cross it over with ParaNorman!) Which is on Disney channel, (and it's the only good show on there nowadays) I went to see Wreck-It-Ralph. (Also an awesome movie. I'm buying the DVD when it comes out) AND season 3 of MLP: FIM came out (WATCH IT!)  
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**So yeah. I've been sooo busy. I'm sorry, guys! *grovels a bit* Hopefully, I can get the next chapter out this month... I hope.  
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**Also, What do you guys think of my new profile image? And I'm thinking a bout getting a cover for this. And since I'm a terrible artist/ have a computer with out a scanner or any artsy stuff, I was wondering if anybody could help me out with that? Please?  
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**Next time: Angel VS. Canus  
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